I sometimes feel pushed by other people to be flexible with my boundaries. It is most often from people who don’t know me very well. Part of this comes with people reflecting their own beliefs around boundaries on other people or people being rigid in their belief systems about how people should act or behave. But without a doubt, I have taken so much time to learn about myself, explore my own boundaries, and understand what my needs are, that I am now no longer willing to waiver on my boundaries to please other people.
I know myself well, I know what foods and beverages make me feel good or not, I know how much sleep I need, and I know my limits of time spent around other people. And when someone wants to push one of these limits that I know the outcomes of doing so, I will unwaveringly stand my ground. For example, if someone pushes me to hang out with people I do not know, for a long period of time, in a crowded place, I know that I will feel anxious, become disconnected, and feel exhausted. So therefore, I will not participate in order to please someone else.
We live in a society that is afraid to say no.
We are afraid to say no when we have a valid reason, or just the valid internal feeling that it isn’t right for us. And I want to live in a “no” society. One that prioritizes each of our well-beings before the expectation to look, act, or be a certain way.
What will happen if you just say no? Maybe you will be more understanding when someone else tells you no. What will happen if you respect your own boundaries? Maybe you will be more willing to then respect the boundaries of others. And maybe you will find you start respecting yourself and others in new ways too.
